The leaves had started their usual transformation. There was a hint of burnt orange color beginning to materialize. I had begun my freshmen year of college. I was walking to my first class that morning listening to my friend gushing about this guy she met in her Chemistry class. She asked me for a second opinion and I was happy to oblige. When I first laid eyes on him, I couldn’t help but to be transfixed by his manly build and his intelligence. I loved debating him. He was a walking book of knowledge. From my first few encounters I desired to see more of him. I found myself hoping that every morning I would run into him. I was unsure what I’d say if I ever did run into him, but I had to see him. I was torn between my friend who had been loyal and very good to me and the man I found to be irresistable. I chose the latter. We spent time together in secret. We still were stuck in the “just friends zone”. One night we attended a house party that was thrown by his admirer. After the alcohol stopped pouring and we finally figured a way to get the most intoxicated people home there were only the three of us left. My friend desperately tried to lure him into her bed. He denied her advances. I still wasn’t sure if he was interested in more than a friendship. I went to my own bed alone and deep in thought. I lay in bed alone obsessed with the man who lay a floor beneath me. Eventually I fell asleep with conditions of my complicated love triangle swirling above my head. I was the rope in the middle of an emotional tug of war. On one hand I would maintain my friendship and lose a man who I knew was extraordinary. On the other I would betray my friend and risk that he felt the same way about me. Somehow I fell asleep still lost in my own thoughts. I awoke the next morning in the midst of taking of shower and getting ready for the day I lost track of everything. I was already behind schedule. I walked downstairs to the spare bathroom to get ready dressed in only a bra and shorts when something moved on the couch. “Well good morning to you too” was his only reply. I felt his eyes scan over every inch of my exposed skin. Later that night we all met up again. This time we decided to go watch a movie. On our way there my friend tried to impress him by snatching his keys and forcing us to just pile in. I sat in the backseat in the middle. I didn’t bother putting on my seat belt I figured I was safe. We sped all the down thru a crowded traffic jammed downtown. She was so preoccupied by bragging on how she could handle his car that she failed to see that she had run a red light and that a full-sized truck was about to plow into the side of the tiny sports car. I remember the screech of the brakes. My body propelled forward towards the windshield. I hit something solid. It felt like a safety bar had been quickly put up in front of me. I was knocked back into my seat. After I composed myself and knew I was ok, I looked up to see where the bar that saved me came from. His quick thinking had saved me. Seeing I was shaken up he put his hand on my knee and said “just in case Chris runs another red light I’ll be ready.” We watched the movie. He dropped us off at our house and that was the end of the eventful night.
The following week I went to class to find that it had been cancelled. I went to the library to catch up with my studies. With all of my extracurricular activities my school work had been become a second priority to everything else. I was in the middle of reading about an Indian war that occurred in the 1800′s when my phone went off. He texted me “meet me at the football field, you owe me a race.” More than happy to escape the boredom of US history before 1900′s, I jumped at the chance. He was waiting for me in the middle of the football field. I had always boasted that in a race I could out sprint him. We lined up at the start line. a friend said “Ready… Set…Go!” I ran hard, but he still ran faster. Just as he was bragging about out running the runner the thunder shook the ground. And then the heavens poured down an insane amount of water upon us. The closest shelter was my car. Once inside he softly touched my face. Years later we discussed this event and he said “I’ve never seen anyone look as beautiful as you did that day. Your face was the flushed. You hair was soaking wet. You were plain and simple and effortlessly stunning. “
The time finally came for him to meet my parents. They were curious as to who I had been spending all of my time with. We all met up at restaurant overlooking the water. I don’t think there was moment of awkwardness. After we finished gorging ourselves on amazing seafood my parents bid us good night and left. I took him to a pier. We walked over a set of railroad tracks. The night was chilly we had both forgot our jackets. As I walked on the pier my hand in his all I could hear was the crashing of the waves against the rocks underneath us. Every star was visible in the night sky that night. He looked over at me shivering. He stopped walking and pulled me close into his chest. My body held securely against his. The warmth of his body surged through me. I glanced up at him. He kissed me. The world stood still for that moment. My heart skipped a beat. I wanted it to be never-ending. A train whistled from a mile up the track. He said “have you ever put a coin on the track?” I hadn’t. He ran ahead the train placed a nickel on the rail. The train whooshed by. As we scoured the track for the pressed nickel I stopped to think how lucky I was to have this experience. We eventually found the nickel. I kept it in slot in my wallet for many years. The night turned even colder. I had never learned to drive a stick shift. He gave me my first lesson. He drove me home as I got out of the car I could smell the clutch burning.
While driving to my calculus class I decided to surprise him. I stopped at a coffee shop and grabbed his favorite iced latte and pastry. I knocked on his door. I had awaken him. Still half asleep we both crawled into bed, snuggled in and fell asleep. I was entwined within his arms. He pulled me in closer and passionately kissed me. We had sex that morning for the first time. He felt amazing. He was so big and strong that I felt like a dainty damsel. After we were both equally satisfied he suggested we shower together. I had never had a steamier shower. I watched the water run down every curve of his muscles. I felt like we were two people in the jungle making love under the waterfall. Once the water turned frigid we abandoned the shower for the bedroom. He bent me over the bed which faced his mirrored closet. I couldn’t help but look. I took a peek at his face as he thrusted into me. The expression on his face was one of complete and absolute gratification. I caught a glimpse of my naked body wrapped around his. It was extremely erotic. My dark brown eyes pierced through his soul. I had never seen my reflection be so sexual and seductive. Once our carnal desires were satisfied we laid in bed together as lovers do. Basking in the silence. I caressed his body. I don’t recall how I got home that night. I remember my mother bringing to my attention that I had red marks all across my body. They were souvenirs of the intense shower. I went to my room with a smirk on my face and a giggle on my lips.
The seasons changed and I knew our love affair was over. Life’s natural course pulled us in separate directions. My heart was in shambles, but I knew I had to let him go. We both could never muster the courage to utter the three little words that would’ve changed everything. I didn’t need him to say it. I knew he loved me. I had healed his heart from his previous heartache and for that he was always grateful to have met me. Years have passed since that enchanting autumn. The pieces of my heart eventually fused back together. My heart was destined for someone else. I will never forget that season. The night the earth stop orbiting the sun. Memories fade, but the time we shared was unforgettable. One day I’ll meet another man who I could share an equally sultry and impeccable relationship with and this time I’ll have the guts to say “I love you.” I lost a friend, but I gained so much more. For love is gamble. One never knows whether love will last. I gladly tear my heart open just for another night underneath the stars with someone who is unforgettable.